Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Life According to Fenton

This is literally the best thing I have ever seen.

I have watched this video over and over and over again.  And I laugh with tears rolling down my face every time.  It's funny and it's real and it's actually a perfect explanation of the meaning of life.

I can so relate to Fenton's Human (FH).  Here they are, having a lovely stroll in the park --- like they do every day --- amongst the wild deer in the sunshine.  FH is probably thinking about his to-do list, resolving to finish a basement project and get caught up on his correspondence, and to simply make it a good, significant, productive day, which will begin just as soon as Fenton takes a whizz.  But on this day, without explanation, Fenton has an epiphany and realizes there is more to life than peeing on a tree.  And thus, he takes off into the deep blue yonder with full abandon.

FH has now lost complete control.  His schedule is irreparably taken off course, his tranquility ripped apart like a scab on a band aid.  Further, Fenton is absolutely not listening to anything except the call of the wild, and this could potentially lead to:  a) severe public humiliation for FH; b) a gruesome death to one or more innocent deer; c) multiple fines levied by the township for a violation of many laws; or d) all of the above.  And best of all, someone got it on video.

So many days, I feel like FH, just chasing after my life, desperately trying to:

  • Offer my best at work
  • Manage volunteer responsibilities
  • Keep the house within fire marshal guidelines
  • Replenish food every 36 hours
  • Give the impression that I am successfully raising a teen and a tween
  • Pretend I make time for my spouse, and 
  • Deal with my rear end, which is resisting the confines of denim like a popcorn bag in an overheated microwave.

But then, I can also feel like Fenton.  On the days when I realize that I have zero control over any of the bullet points in my world, I drive myself to Taco Bell in my pajamas and play Soda Crush on my Ipad until I beat that #$%@^ level.

Of course, the moral of the story is that there is a balance, that we can mow the lawn AND run through it naked with the sprinklers on.  Maybe the next time Fenton has a psychotic break, FH will realize that it's only temporary, that his dog will come back, and that he should enjoy the moment to lay down amongst the flowers and be thankful for all the things that make him happy.  He just needs to make sure he doesn't lay down in deer poo.

Until next time, keep crowin' - and this one's for you, Arie!

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