Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Big Salads

I wore the same thing today that I wore yesterday. But I did switch out my black jeans for black pants, because I had to go into the office. I knew I wouldn't see anyone today that I had seen yesterday, so I was in the clear. I didn't even shower. I handled my cowlicks with my daughter's flat iron, which had been left on my nightstand.  We have this new ritual where before school every morning she sits on my bed and eats breakfast and I do her hair. It's really the only way this is going to happen because I have a problem getting out of bed in the mornings. 

It's beyond laziness - it's an issue.  It stresses me out to have to get up early; being tired makes me sad. I can't function properly. For instance, my husband couldn't take our son to his 7:00 a.m. bus the other day, so literally, my son got me out of bed in time to get in the car and drive him to the stop. I stayed in the car and didn't speak to the other parents because I didn't have on a bra or shoes and I needed to tinkle. At my age, you can't hold it in as well as you could during the beer-busts in your 20's. (My husband did give my son breakfast, so you can cancel the call to DFCS.)

It was a busy day, and I was trying to stave off a funk - whose arrival is clearly heralded by my lack of interest in getting out of bed before 10:00 a.m., bathing, or changing clothes - so I treated myself to a big salad. I absolutely, positively, even-more-than-hamburgers, LOVE a big salad. I like to mix up all the ingredients with the dressing and make a chunky soup out of it. I like to have a little bit of everything in each bite, and I save my favorites, like the hard-boiled egg, for last. And I like them best when I can make them myself. My newest addiction is the salad bar at Whole Foods. It's AMAZING!  They have chick peas and bac-un bits, and onions and slaws and marinated mushrooms and magical mixtures from their secret headquarters. I fill up a bio-degradable box and rush it home so that I can fill one corner with Thousand Island and dip, dip, dip. It makes me so happy.

The big salad is an indulgence, something that I truly enjoy. I have some other indulgences, like a good (or bad) bottle of red wine, news reporter bloopers on YouTube, and getting my hair cut at a proper salon by a punk rocker. Keeping the funk away isn't easy, especially the closer you get to menopause, and sometimes the happy pills aren't enough.  But a salad for lunch and then a Whole Foods mega-chicken pot pie for dinner --- lawdy.  It does more for me than a hot shower or clean underwear.

I hope that you have a funk-deterrent for your rainy days.  But if you don't, then please watch this video and pretend that it was made just for you:

Until next time, keep crowin' and get yourself some chick peas!

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