Something Wicked This Way Comes

I don't do scary.  Not in the movie theater, not on TV, not in books, not on Halloween.  For.get.it.  Because what happens is that I see black magic and then I can't sleep for 2 days and I am 100% convinced that Jason or Freddy or an escaped convict are going to get me.  I can't even watch ghost hunting or psychic shows because I will work myself into a frenzy, sure that there is a poltergeist or dead old lady in the hallway.

I have been a scaredy cat my whole life.  But I have never known true fear until yesterday.  It started innocently enough.  I was surfing Facebook, liking posts and reading inspirational verses.  And then, like the devil riding in on a flaming demon, was this photo, posted by a sorority sister who was doing recon for a friend.

Let me preface this by saying it is real, it is alive, and it has TEETH.  And it is not a Muppet. It was on someone's deck. And I ask you, in the name of all that is holy and good, what the HELL is this?!  Do you see it's eyeball?  It is like a little cartoon booger that  jumped out of the TV and escaped into our world.  Is it an alien scout looking for new water sources?  Is it a mutant turtle from the sewers?

Whatever it is, homey ain't playin'.  And I encourage anyone who encounters it to run like the wind.  Because it will eat your brain.

Until next time, keep crowin' and wear closed-toe shoes at all times!